Philadelphia Eagles same as ever

The Philadelphia Eagles are the NFL version of the old Talking Heads song, “Once in a Lifetime”. You know the song. “Same as it ever was. Same as it ever was. Same as it ever was.”
I am not bringing this up to wax nostalgic about 80’s pop music. (Although did you know that the Buggles “Video Killed the Radio Star” was the very first video shown on MTV on August 1, 1981? You know, back when MTV actually showed music videos. No? Never mind.)

Anyway, that song describes the Eagles perfectly. No matter what happens, they are always the same. “Same as it ever was.” Unfortunately, that is not a good thing.

This Eagles organization will always be a bunch of arrogant Douchebags who will never win a damn thing. Owner Jeffrey Lurie talks about Championships (plural) and being the “Gold Standard”. Team President Joe Banner lies with every word that comes out of his mouth and tells fans “If you don’t like it, don’t buy tickets”, because he knows there is a long waiting list for tickets. General Manager Howie Roseman talks like he’s a real GM even though he doesn’t have final say on personnel and Banner controls the salary cap. And Andy Reid is an arrogant, hypocritical bully who treats the media and fans like they don’t know anything about football.

These men continue to act in this completely unacceptable manner in spite of the fact that the trophy case at team headquarters remains empty. They should get used to that because they will never win a Super Bowl.

I bring all of this up because they are at it again.

The team made bold proclamations, through their lapdogs in the local media during the lockout, that they would unleash an aggressive plan in free agency as soon as the lockout was over. We’re still waiting. “Same as it ever was.”

Yes, they did actually sign one free agent today, but I haven’t exactly heard Eagles fans planning their spot on the Super Bowl Championship parade route because they signed defensive end Jason Babin. But that doesn’t mean it was a bad signing.

Babin is not only a good signing and a good fit in this defense, but he is the guy I have been saying they should sign all along. Babin played for new defensive line coach Jim Washburn last season in Tennessee and had 12 1/2 sacks. That would be 10 more sacks than he had for the Eagles the season before that. He is also good against the run and will actually prevent offenses from triple teaming the Eagles other defensive end, Trent Cole, on every single play.

The problem is that Babin isn’t a superstar and that’s what the Eagles led us to believe they would get with their “aggressive approach”. Hell, Babin isn’t even as good as Ray Edwards, who is universally considered to be far superior to Babin, but would have also cost far more money. So, the Eagles took the cheaper option in filling their need for a defensive end. “Same as it ever was.”

Speaking of being cheap, the Eagles have a disgruntled star wide receiver who wants more money. While the Eagles have talked a good game regarding DeSean Jackson, they have yet to put their money where their mouth is. If they had taken care of Jackson last season when they should have, he wouldn’t be holding out of training camp right now. By waiting and trying to outsmart everyone (as usual) they have misplayed their hand (as usual). Now that Santonio Holmes has re-signed with the Jets for $50 million over 5 years, Jackson and his agent, Drew “No Comment” Rosenhaus, will want more. The Eagles won’t pay more and frankly, Jackson doesn’t deserve more.

Jackson is a one-trick-pony now after getting the snot knocked out of him going over the middle last season. You don’t pay $10 million per season to a guy who only runs fly-patterns, no matter how dynamic he is. The problem is, they don’t have any alternatives if Jackson holds out. Way to wait too long again Eagles. “Same as it ever was.”

Speaking of waiting too long, the Eagles finally got around to completing the most talked about trade of the offseason. The Eagles held up the trade of quarterback Kevin Kolb to the Arizona Cardinals because they tried to squeeze more out of the Cards at the last minute. Apparently they wanted a first round draft choice in addition to cornerback Dominique Rodgers-Cromartie. That’s not surprising since the Eagles front office previously said that they would get two first round draft picks for Kolb.

The problem is that, as usual, the Eagles completely overvalued their position. Kolb was never going to get them that much and they were damn lucky to get what they did. They destroyed Kolb’s trade value themselves by benching their “quarterback of the future” after a whole 30 minutes last season. Then they almost waited too long this offseason to consummate this trade. They tried to hold up the Cardinals after every other possible trade partner had already gotten their quarterback or were in the process of getting their man. They’re lucky the Cardinals didn’t tell them to shove their demands and turn around and make a deal with Denver for Kyle Orton. “Same as it ever was.”

I will give the Eagles credit for getting a starting cornerback in the deal, since they had a glaring need opposite Asante Samuel. The only problem is that the only cornerback in the NFL who likes contact less than Rodgers-Cromartie is Samuel. Combine that with the unsettled safety situation on the Eagles defense, where Nate Allen is coming back from a season-ending injury and the strong safety will either be a rookie (Jarrett) or second year player (Coleman) and it could be a long season of missed tackles.

One last thing on the Kolb trade. The Eagles will regret this. Vick will get hurt because he always gets hurt and he isn’t as good as everybody seems to believe. I have written novels detailing how overrated Vick is. Anyone who ignored how poorly he played in the second half of last season is either blind or knows nothing about football. Sure Vick had 11 touchdowns and no interceptions with a 115.1 passer rating in his first six games. But everyone seems to forget that he had just 7 touchdowns and 5 interceptions with a lowly 84.4 passer rating in his last four games of the season. And don’t forget that horrible late-game pick he threw in the playoffs against the Packers when the game was still in doubt. I guess everybody just believed Reid when he blamed it all on his kicker huh?

Kolb will throw for more yards than Vick in 2011. You heard it here first.

Now that Kolb is gone, the Eagles don’t have a legitimate backup quarterback. Sorry, but Mike Kafka is not the answer. Since Vick has a history of always getting hurt and the Eagles offensive line stinks, the Eagles will need the services of a good backup quarterback this coming season. I’m betting they get someone terrible like Vince Young to continue this ridiculous reclamation project plan they seem to have going here. Hey Andy, this is a football team, not a chance for you to clear you conscience about failing your two drug-addicted convict sons. “Same as it ever was.”

The Eagles declined to re-sign a single one of their 15 free agents. While that may be looked at as moving forward, I think it proves my long-standing assertion that Reid couldn’t draft a decent talent from the NFL Hall of Fame. Letting placekicker David Akers and punter Sav Rocca leave and replacing them with rookies is a recipe for disaster. Letting safety Quintin Mikell and linebacker Stewart Bradley leave when there is not a suitable replacement available reminds me of when the team let Brian Dawkins and Jerremiah Trotter leave as free agents. Neither one was adequately replaced and the results were disastrous. “Same as it ever was.”

The free agency period has just begun, so the Eagles have a chance to fill more holes. That’s a good thing since they have so many holes to fill on a defense that was so bad it broke records. Unfortunately, they don’t seem to be interested in filling any of those holes with the best players available even though they have plenty of cap space available.

Every team must spend 95% of the $20 million salary cap, but Joe Banner is the, ahem, “Gold Standard” of creative cap management. Banner will figure out a way to make it seem like the eagles are spending their money while still lining Lurie’s pockets with millions from the very fans who funded their stadium and support the team in spite of it’s glaring lack of trophies. “Same as it ever was. Same as it ever was. Same as it ever was…………..”